Submitted for your observation: two primates. One of them of them, Genus Homo, Species Sapien, is named Sandra. The other, Genus Pan, species Troglodyte, was named Travis. Travis was apparently well-known around his home town of Stamford, Connecticut, where
He rode around in trucks belonging to the towing company operated by his owner.
In 2003, he escaped from his owner's vehicle in downtown Stamford for two hours. Police then used cookies, macadamia treats and ice cream in an attempt to lure him back into the vehicle.
At the time of the 2003 escape, police said the owners told them the chimpanzee was toilet trained, dressed and bathed himself, ate at the table and drank wine from a stemmed glass.
You get some idea of the relative size of Travis and his "owner" from the photo above. He weighs a good two hundred pounds, more than she does, I am guessing. But that's deceiving. Much more of Travis' muscle weight is shifted upward into his chest and shoulders. He is more than twice as strong, with a body built to resists shocks that would drop a heavy weight boxer.
I am skeptical about the toilet training, though I don't doubt that a chimpanzee is smart enough for that. But I can't help noticing that he seems to be wearing diapers in the photo. Toilet training seems to require a certain set of instinctual behaviors that dogs and humans have, but chimpanzees apparently don't. I don't doubt at all the bit about table manners and wine glasses. But all that tells us more about Sandra and her species than Travis and his. We are primed by evolution to recognize and connect with others of our own kind. These same spiritual gifts make it possible for us to bond with animals, but often as not that bonding involves a mistake. Dogs may indeed love us but fish and ferns do not, whatever cute names we give the latter. Chimpanzees may come to love us, but they aren't us. Confusions about that can be deadly.
The New York Times reports that Travis went amok again on Monday. This time he mauled and critically injured a woman visiting the Herold home.
Sandra Herold, the owner of the 15-year-old chimpanzee, wrestled with the animal as it mauled her friend, then ran inside to call 911. "She retrieved a large butcher knife and stabbed her longtime pet numerous times in an effort to save her friend, who was really being brutally attacked," [Police] Captain Conklin said.
The woman suffered "a tremendous loss of blood" from serious facial injuries, he said.
I'm sure it's possible to kill a chimpanzee with a butcher knife, but you'd have to be pretty strong and you'd have to know what you were doing. Ms. Herold didn't manage to slow Travis down. But it gets better.
Travis ran away and started roaming on the property as the police arrived. But the chimpanzee returned and went after several of the officers, who retreated into their cars, Captain Conklin said. Travis knocked a mirror off a cruiser before he opened its door and started to get in, trapping the officer. That officer shot the chimpanzee several times, Captain Conklin said.
The Chimpanzee opened the door of the police car. Then, despite being shot several times, Travis still had enough steam to run off before dying of his wounds.
It was only four years ago that a California man was viciously mauled by two chimpanzees at an animal compound, where he was visiting Moe, a chimp that he had raised as a member of his own family. The attackers (not Moe, but two younger Chimps) chewed off most of his face, his fingers, and his genitals.
There is a long history of confusion about Chimpanzees. For a long time, researchers were convinced that they were peaceful primates. That's because all they were observed doing was eating and copulating. Then in the seventies the first chimpanzee war was recorded in the Gombe preserve in Tanzania. A group of chimps systematically annihilated a rival group by isolating and beating to death all of its males. It took four years.
It is criminally stupid to keep a chimpanzee as a pet, or allow one to roam about uncontrolled. Training them to eat at the table only sets the table for tragedy. They are our nearest mammalian relative. Like human males, chimpanzee males are programmed for aggression. Like us, they are capable of opening the door of a police car. We are more dangerous in the long run only because we know how to fire the policeman's gun. That is another lesson to be learned.
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