While I'm on the subject of disturbing parallels, think about Governor Jesse Ventura (10,000 Lakes. One Navy Seal.), and then consider this story. From the Star Tribune:
Looking for something really, really different in a political candidate this year? Take a gander at Jonathon (The Impaler) Sharkey, who will launch his gubernatorial campaign in Princeton, Minn., on Friday the 13th as a "satanic dark priest" and the leader of the "Vampyres, Witches and Pagans Party."
Since there's nothing but a $300 filing fee to stop anyone from running for statewide office, campaigns in Minnesota typically attract colorful and eccentric characters looking for attention. And of course, former Gov. Jesse Ventura broke the mold and got elected. But Minnesota may never have seen a more outside-the-box politician than the Impaler, also a former pro wrestler.
Pro-wrestler running for Governor in Minnesota? Checks out so far. And he describes himself as a veteran, so maybe he can pick up some of the Kerry vote. Of course, as a vampyre, he will probably have to be sworn in at night. He will only be an "outside the box politician" between sunset and sunrise. But its hard to take his prospects seriously. Surely during a televised debate, his opponents could reduce him to silence merely by waving a cross. And come to think of it, would he show up on camera anyway?
But he does have some innovative proposals.
Quite some distance from the mainstream, however, is his pledge to execute -- by impalement in front of the State Capitol -- terrorists, rapists, drug dealers, child abusers, repeat drunken drivers and anybody who preys on the elderly.
Now there's a proposal with legs. Or maybe bat wings. But I do have some concerns. Vampyres are more or less immortal, so unless some political opponent manages to stake him when the staff is not looking, we will end up paying him social security benefits forever. Hat tip to James Tarranto's Best of the Web.
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