The wheels of democratic government were jammed fast by a tootsie roll in St. Paul this week. This from the Grandforks Herald-Commune's "Happenings at the Minnesota Capital," feature, which turned out to be an optimistic title.
Sen. Mike Jungbauer, R-East Bethel, thought the Senate would make quick work of his bill allowing politicians to hand out candy at parades without violating bribery laws. The proposal was deemed so mundane that it was on the "consent calendar," which is usually reserved for items with broad support.
Sounds like an easy one? Not so.
The bill applies to gifts of "nominal" value, but Sen. Tom Neuville, R-Northfield, was uncomfortable with the vagueness. "Could someone give away cans of pop at a parade? Would that be nominal?" he asked rhetorically.
Sen. Ellen Anderson, DFL-St. Paul, raised the safety concerns. "This bill doesn't really get at the issue of whether or not it's a good idea or bad idea to throw stuff out of cars," she said. Kids lining the route shouldn't be enticed to run out in the street when there are moving cars, she said.
But then come to think of it, aren't parades an unacceptable public menace in the first place? Miles of heavy steel concealed beneath paper flowers moving deceptively slowly only feet away from innocent men women and children, alongside a few Republicans. Its shocking that nothing has been done up to now.
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